4:53 AM

wholesome happiness...

MissQ is happy…content and smiling. Absolute best weekend. So I lost the bowling as expected and captain juju was a pretty modest winner ;) lol ok, maybe he went home and did a victory dance – and filmed it. Weird how you sometimes only realize how much you’ve missed someone til the moment you see them at the door and that all this time, you’ve settled for mediocrity and become a cardboard person. But I think I scared him with my rage in Joyland lol, in his words ‘the basket ball fury of winter 2007’ and in my words, the night he won me ‘the gay teddy bear.’ Brilliant Kodak moment. Other juju moments:
Out at breakfast one morning:
Juju: whose that singer – the blonde one with the Ben Affleck jaw?
Q: umm…Michael Bolton?
Juju: No no…Jessica Simpson! That’s it.

To my mum as we were leaving on Saturday night:
Q: be good, no house parties mommy.
Juju: we’ll be phoning to check up on you to see if you’re behaving ;)
Lol, mum went red. It was too cute.

I cant remember the rest in order lol…they were better, but im keeping them to myself for later blackmail reference ;) im just glad out of all the people we went to school with who he cant remember, I didn’t fade away into oblivion.
But then he had to go away ;( in a plane ;( Til December ;( Not nice.
I think the next night jo and I freaked mj out with our ability to wolf down huge savoury waffles and drinks and an extra hot chocolate – and mj’s smile which gave our waitress a spring in her step and a heart in his milkshake ;) oh and I did things missQ doesn’t usually do, like buying striped clothing. Q doesn’t do stripes. She’s afraid of colours getting too close for comfort with each other and fighting for attention, but I think perfect weekend unleashed the need for colour – and this pink and white striped creation makes me dizzy, but its fun and smiley and happy and energetic ;) like current ecstatic, sparkly state (green mxit smiley here). Wholesome happiness. That’s the way it should be.

Speaking of wholesome thingies, MissQ got all domesticated yesterday! I put on my swarovsky earrings, sparkly top, new jeans – and went to the kitchen…made these yummy date crunchies..ooh, with dates, rice crispies, tennis biscuits and coconut…see:

They’re so yummy and crunchy with the bits of biscuit, I had some for breakfast, u know, coz it did have cereal in it ;) and they take like 7 minutes to make! sugar rush after-effects kicking in now…and I made lil mash potato and veg pies…great day for mum lol. Oh, mum went to this AIDS training course with all these other KZN pharmacists and she totally rocked it! She was group leader and they had these hectic questions and my mommy blew em away, me soo proud of her ;) I think when she came home that day, I started thinking about my exam results…had forgotten about them in current state of smileyness. And I had this dream where because of the strike, the IOLS department told us to go collect our marks at 9pm…so I went – in my pj’s! and everybody saw! And I had these big fluffy slippers that kept making noise and I kept running away from the office, but they made so much noise that it got ppl’s attention…terrible! So I ran to this cave and I didn’t realize I was running towards this mafia den. Gawd. They had aquariums built into the walls or something. Well. At least I wasn’t naked.

Ugh.results.makes me sick thinking about it…wasn’t the best exam period I’ve had. but we’ll see I suppose. And this ache in my jaw isn’t helping! I ate something 2 weeks ago and I heard this ‘click’ in my jaw and then it got all wonky and painful…I thought by now, it would’ve clicked itself into correction, but I guess my stubbornness is a physical trait too…I don’t wanna go to doc…but 2weeks is forever.

MissQ’s song of the month: Michael Bublè - ‘My Everything.’
*beeeeg hug*
Smiles are contagious :D you’re infected now ;)

2:35 AM

conversations of another world (2)

On the bus…crabby, its early, staring out the window..

Q (feeling sorry for herself, thinking): gawd. I shouldn’t have to take the dam bus! Life isn’t going anywhere. I wish something good would just happen, coz I’m letting everything go…its so unfair.
*two girls start talking behind me…
A: How was your trip to Zambia?
B: oh it was stunning! Such a lovely place to have a conference. Everyone was there.
A: sounds good – made any new friends?
B: Quite a few actually – I met this lady. Her husband just died last month and she was so strong, but on the inside you could see she was all cut up. She wouldn’t eat anything, she kept talking about him, like she couldn’t believe her whole life had disappeared with him.
A: oh my gosh…that’s terrible. I cant imagine what I’d do if that happened to me…but you used to talk with her?
A: yeah, we became good friends…and I met this other guy…he was in a wheelchair. He had no legs, but it didn’t let him stop him from getting to the conference…
B: wow, your trip sounded so inspiring! You must have learnt so much.
A: yeah…I realized that I’m so lucky…at least I have one leg.

2:15 AM

cake...

At my first high school fair, I remember mom buying me one of those frames with the meaning of your name in it and all those funny little qualities that were attributed to you because of it…I think mine said ‘I had a few friends but they meant the world to me’ (which at the time, was a load of hogwash, coz I had lotsa acquaintances who basically copied my homework and used my stapler) and I had no good friends for a while at that icy private school; and it said I’d thrive in the political arena – which, for a shy, awkward girl, was as far-fetched as pole dancing ;)

Many years on, and there I was last week, talking to my tutor about choices of courses next year and it hit me that this entire dynamic world of power, people who use it, abuse it…its consequences on people, this economy that keeps people lusting after influence while others on the ground fighting for ‘the good of the people’….it all just makes me tick! And I want to have an opinion, not just let it all pass and look back and think, ‘damn, shouldn’t have let that go.’ Lol, I don’t wanna be an ashwin desai or some MEC in South Africa with assassination plots on my tail or even one of those bullet-proof vested reporters (by the way, how’s that gonna help if you get shot in the head? I think bullet-proof helmets is a niche market waiting to be explored! ;)), but researcher or political analyst sounds nice? Well…after I have a good few pounds to my name.

And while on this epic journey of self-discovery, I’ve decided on a few other fundamental things like – I want to have cake at my wedding. Why doesn’t anyone have wedding cake anymore? I know its not an ‘Islamic tradition’ (hmm…those words aren’t supposed to be together, but you know where im headed), but cake’s important! Ok, so last week’s episode of Top Billing may have influenced me, but I have to have a 3 tier white cake, with long strings of light blue glass beads hanging delicately off the top and middle tier, all reflecting the light…oh and silver dust! Um…and I don’t want all ribbons and fussy things on it. It has to be simple and classy and yummy! Its been on my mind this week. Ended up going to a unique wedding last week…it was a small nikah and dinner at Bombay to Beirut (Ohmygod…prawns, chicken jalfrezi…Italian kisses, really helped my flu), but the whole thing was a bit of a somber affair. See, she was becoming a second wife, and also, her mom passed away last year. It was different – none of the groom’s immediate family attended except his mom. And while many people had a lot to say, she’s happy – and I think not having your own mum at your wedding must be one of the worst things to have to deal with. As for the second wife thing..he has 3 kids already. I mean, how must they have felt? Anyway, it all went well I guess. But there was no cake for em to slice! ;) it would be so cool to freeze it and indulge a year later. Even if you break a tooth on the icing.lol. Surviving a year of marriage is an accomplishment these days. Hmm, though I wonder if people would really want to see one year old frozen cake…missQ has crazy idea to go put a piece of swiss roll in the freezer now and see what happens next year this time. Tried doing that to white roses with pink, sugared petals, but I think the maid threw them out with the iced bananas I had stashed in there and forgot about.

Anyhoo, lots of interesting and exciting things happening this week ;) meeting a friend I haven’t seen in aaages! And she has a lil baby! so im gonna get to pinch his cheeks and tickle him and feed him all mashed up things and dress him up like a sailor lol ;) That’s if I don’t freak him out the moment I smile widely at him and grab him.
Damn I miss blogging ;( but MissQ needs to focus on writing something worth-while this holiday. Will check in now and then. Miss you.
*hugs*

11:47 PM

achoo!


this one! this is the baba i want...

im sooo tired. I got the flu and its that achy feeling all over that makes you wish someone would just flatten you out with a rolling pin lol…I really have to rock my paper today. Hehe, I had a crazy dream about my lecturer whose paper im writing today. We were in Pirates of the Caribbean (no, I wasn’t keira) and the sea was at the bottom of the library…and he insisted that the only way I could pass was if I changed my clothes, ironed them, and put em back on again. Anyway, I refused and ended up in the CCMA where I was fighting for the right to eat my lunch in class ;) but it didn’t stop there! Later on, I found out he got a job in a pharmacy as the parcel-counter guy! And he was sitting there, marking my work and he gave me 23% for something!! Yeah..thats about it.
Was doddling around at home yesterday when all these people from my class started calling to find out about today…so I just watched my phone flashing…but this girl asked me the other day ‘are you sure you don’t know more than what the rest of us know about what’ll be in the paper?’ now that made me mad! And I asked ‘what are you implying?’ and she was kinda shocked but it really surprised me…

Oh well, MissQ’s last day today. Cant decide about this holiday…I had all these plans about getting together with friends…now im thinking I should work. Hmm..i should see whether im alive by next week Monday…this flu isn’t pretty. Some ppl can pull off a pretty flu – where they tend to look all cute and warm…im not like that. I look deathly sick, like I sold my soul to the devil. That happens in Ramadaan too.
I was thinking…fate or ‘God’s will’ can really have you in awe sometimes…recently, I was at the bustop and my friend smsed to say she was on her way..lol the bus came and went but I decided to wait for her and took the later bus. When we got to town, it was eerie and quiet and most of the shops were closed…if I had taken the earlier bus, I would’ve been caught in the midst of a violent march which I hadn’t even thought about. On the same day, I decided to take the bus before my usual stop (I take 2buses a day) and as we approached the place where I normally take the bus, the cops were out in full force coz right then and there, there was some drug bust and a shootout…if that wasn’t enough to freak me out…this morning, I somehow got the early bus, and mum called me just now to tell me that there was a shootout outside the bank there a few minutes after I had gotten the bus. Makes you wonder. Luck? Good timing? Fate? I think its no coincidence that certain factors allow you to be in these places at the right time. And we may think that Allah (SWT) lets us down by making life difficult sometimes or not fulfilling your duaas immediately…but looking closer, its His very protection that keeps us breathing..that allows me to walk through town everyday and not have my fears realized…that keeps my mum safe everyday…lol even kept Jo alive during those ‘Architorture’ days when she used to walk through Russell Street with her bag!!

And I think in subtle way, He takes nonsense out of your life..shows you people’s true colours before you make mistakes…and it can make you angry about getting hurt, but in essence, He saves you from making bigger mistakes that can impact you further on. Patience, I think is crucial. Ok, enough philosophy for today…

MissQ isn’t going to be around for a lil bit…seeing as internet at home still not hooked up – and internet cafĂ© boy looks at me funny ;) so…here are my demands:
1. jo and MissQ have to bake cupcakes together!
2. Mj: you can be the taster. Pyari pyari lamhe my sugardumpling :)
3. Dew and us need to stop avoiding the ice and go skating
4. Mario, do not jet off anywhere without informing MissQ! If you land up in a war-torn place with a slab of chocolate and ppl trying to steal it from you or bomb you – hand over the chocolate! And if you’re near the sea and a tsunami approaches – do not run towards the water! :D
5. juju: I suggest you either start training or prepare for defeat in the bowels of Pav bowling alley ;) MissQ will conquer!
And to the rest of blogworld…I demand that you keep being brilliant…and ever great. Waseem and Taqdeer and Fatima :)

I’d like to thank Karan Johar for giving me this opportunity…to work with such greats and still keep my sari on and my ankles healthy after running through the field of blogosphere while singing Kabhi Kabhi ;)

Right. Meds kicking in! im off..ooh, chicken tikka tonight ;P

11:22 PM

triangles...inquisitions and the arrival of the captain

Alas the weekend shot me back in time with a needle and thread, flip-flops and east coast radio. It was a horrible picture…starting with Qdee at home on the couch, hemming her jeans. Firstly, jeans and MissQ don’t agree. Well, its a lop-sided relationship – I love jeans, but its unrequited. I think they repel petite girlies who revel between those difficult sizes and who aren’t tall enough for the hip size or scarecrow-narrow enough for the butt size, leaving you with jeans which waft around your waist, and cling to your thighs for dear life, making you regret last week’s tiramisu and leave your legs looking malnourished like your thighs stole all their thunder. So in all my state of confusion between 4 pairs ranging from 26 to 34, I found it. The perfect pair…as silence drowned out the noise of every pavilion shop and heavenly light descended and we made contact…anyway, its perfect…just needed a lil hem. After sewing elastic onto the top of my burqah (I had a receding burqah line after sajdah due to my procrastination of fixing it.) while pinning my jeans, I realized…there I was, on a Sunday afternoon. Sewing. And humming to the classic hits on ECR!! I think it hit me after hearing myself singing the words to ‘McCarthy Toyota – where peace of mind is part of the deeeeeal.’ And I thought – no, this cant be happening to me. I will not let myself slip even though I wrote an exam the day before and my brain was numb! So off to the beach we went, where I ended up marveling at the book stall. So much for that ;) Ooh but The Namesake was on special ok! Anyway, weekends rock if you make the most of em…or do nothing – whatever rocks your boat.lol, even if its ECR ;)

MissQ has been slightly off-centre recently…uncertain things. Ugh. You know, the constant questioning about what you say, or the way you are…like the assumption that im constantly lonely or ‘in need’ of attention coz im an only child. Or the fact that not having a significant other makes you some depressed bag-lady who sips spiked Ensure on her balcony while winking at an imaginary hunk.
Its not said in so many words, but it comes across. Whoever said significant others were the answer to the world’s problems? Sometimes they can BE a world of problems if its the wrong one;) Of course its awesome to love and be loved, but why rush if its not the right time?
Its not like I haven’t had options…like who could forget the indian triangle…


Or the Chinese inquisition at Christmas in Texas…

Or that day at the zoo, when MissQ discovered white boys…
Lol. So I have history ;) but why is it that if you’re a divorced mom or her daughter, you’re automatically thought of as desperate coz you cant afford to be selective? Please. Bullshit.
Anyway, its not like im going to shut people off for expressing their opinions – its just that people often think they’re judging the whole you, when there’s a vast expanse they haven’t even seen. There are just some things that you don’t broadcast, yet which define you in ways others will never grasp. And often, your cant be yourself around certain people. Get that? Or am I babbling. I end up confronting ppl only if it means something to me that the person knows what’s what. Otherwise I tend to let it go, say its ok or whatever coz its not gonna make a difference in the long run. Lol a close friend said to me the other day that ‘you’re too nice – one day, you’re just gonna flip and go psycho’ hehe. I have had a few nutty moments this year—oh and architecture year, where Qdee swore in public for the first time and threw her lip gloss into the bin angrily in front of everyone coz this weird guy used it and pouted at her.

So the point is…just because I seem a lil unsure of things…uncertain of jeans and my thighs, sometimes shy and avoid confrontations, does not mean Im a ladybug looking to get analysed or squished. I do stand up for myself when it counts…

Bottom line – life is full of diverse, exciting things, with incredible people…


But it isn’t a fairytale…
And it can be cruel and kind and rejuvenating and sweet and heartbreaking and time can stand still and tomorrow it can have you looking back thinking how everything’s gone so fast…essentially, its about what you make of it. Live for the moment. Be happy. Don’t judge people. Coz no matter how well you know someone, you aren’t them. Everything has a reason. This year’s taught me a lot of hard lessons already, like what’s really important…and that your capabilities extend far more than you thought they did…that what you leave behind with no expectation can come back and make your life beautiful…and that sometimes pink strappy sandals aren’t always the best fashion buy ;)

P.S...........

All hail captain juju!! :) http://www.captain-juju.blogspot.com/
MissQ welcomes ‘he who has special power to rock the world’ to blogosphere with icecream, chocolates and a black Peugeot 206 ;) Roll out the red carpet, scatter the glitter, light the lanterns and prepare the feast for his long awaited arrival from the frozen, dry corporate jungle of the northern regions (jhb). Lol. Be nice. One in a million kinda boi :)


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